LP: TCB Chapter 5

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Chapter 5: Looking for clues in all the wrong places

Back in our reality.


Okay, I think the bathroom is up here. So which door is it? Hmm, the fancy one is probably the Colonel's so straight ahead maybe?


Fifteen Minutes Past


Caught Kissing



Oh, that is quite alright my chere. Feel free to get “zee lipstick” wherever you want.

!



Oh! Look at all zis dust on your chair! Oh, and over on zee table as well! We can't have zat.
Young lady, these are my private chambers and I will thank you to stay out of them!
I'm terribly sorry, sir! I was trying to find the powder room.
It's the room with the door bordered by columns and great big statues! I would have thought that to be a clear enough marker. Now, would you kindly turn around and give me back my privacy? Now.
Yes sir! Thank you, sir! Sorry for interup-intruding!



Nnnnnggggaahhh! I can feel the mental scars forming! If this keeps up I'll be a quivering wreck within the hour.




Please be in here, Lillian.



Oh, thank god.
Hmm? Oh, hi Laura.
Lillian, you have no idea how good it is to see you.
It's always good to see me. Anyway, I'm feeling better now. That ride through the bayou had me plumb frazzled.
Dinner probably didn't help.
...No, it didn't. If you need to freshen up, too, I'll be done in just a bit. You look a bit frazzled yourself. Something eating you?



No, I'm fine, I think. The past few minutes have been...eventful, and more than a bit unsettling. I'm afraid I walked into your uncle's room by accident. I don't want to say anything bad about him, bu
Then don't.
What?
If you've got nothing good to say, then don't. Say. Anything. It's only polite.
...You're right. I'm sorry
That's all right. Don't worry yourself too much over it. We'll make a good weekend out of this yet. Want some perfume? I picked it up just before we left.
No thanks, it's nice though. So, don't you have reunion stuff to partake in?
Ahahaha Oh, don't be ridiculous! You saw us at dinner. Do you really think we're a “bond over fond memories” kind of family? Now that we know this was all to hear about Uncle's silly will I think everyone can agree that our time will best be spent seeing each other as little as possible.
I take it you all don't get a long too well. Also, silly will? A will seems like a pretty big deal coming from such an old, and apparently wealthy, family member like your uncle.
Eh, I suppose, but I honestly can't imagine Uncle Henri dying anytime soon, and I'd much rather have more time with him than his money, though I seem to be a minority on that note. Anyway, yes, the thing at dinner, infuriating as it was, is hardly the first time we've gotten into tiffs with one another. It was also probably one of the more civil examples, since it was mostly directed at Uncle Henri.
Not too many of these reunions then?
Yeah, not so much. Mother still somehow manages to find time to keep tabs on them to fuel her rants, though. I imagine some of the others do the same.
That so? Oh, on that subject, your mother wanted to speak with you.
Did she say what about?
No, she just asked where you were and told me to find you after we talked a little.
Probably wants to talk about Uncle's will and complain about the other side of the family then. I'll warn you now, it could take a while, so you're probably better off going for a walk for a little bit.
Alright, I've only seen a couple rooms of the house anyway, so this will let me check it out a little more.
I feel like an absolute beast to keep doing this to you. I promised a fun weekend showing you around and now I've gone and thrown you to the gators, so to speak.
It's fine. I expected you'd have to do some kind of family catching up. You running off earlier was a bigger surprise, honestly.
Sorry for that, but I didn't really want you to see me in that state.
I think I understand.



Well, I'd better get going then. Mother isn't terribly patient.
Oh, uh, before you go, I wanted to ask...do you know how your mother... gets around?
She walks mostly, I guess, unless it's far enough to need a car or carriage. Why?
It's...nothing, just an odd thought.
Well, all right then. Toodles!




That is going to bother me for the longest time.



Well, while I'm here.



Yeah, they went there. Not the fist time, not the last.






Hmm, I should probably check things in here too. People leave the strangest stuff in bathrooms, sometimes.



Oh, just sheets and towels.



Nothing in here, either. I suppose I should be grateful, considering some of the things I've seen in wastebaskets.



And this is...a bathroom bench? What would you even need this for? Eh, not the time to think about it. It doesn't seem to open, so I guess that's everything. I'm beginning to think that checking every drawer and dresser in the house won't be the most productive investigation.



Oh well, at least I found the towels. Now I can take a shower later without needing to bother someone.



So Lillian's busy in our room, the Colonel...is in there.



So does that mean the whole top floor is...



Bedrooms.





Hmm, maybe...



Walnuts, and here I was all set to feel bad about looking inside them.



Ah well. It was worth a shot.



The Colonel certainly likes lounge chairs.




And paintings. I don't think I've ever seen a portrait of a horse.



I need a better method than looking through furniture that most people in this house aren't using.



And looking through suitcases is clearly not going to do the trick. Maybe I should take up lock picking someday.





Of course. That's it, this is the last room I'm doing this in. If I find anything, fine. I'll keep it up. Otherwise, I'm labeling this as pointless.



Getting



really




Thoonk.
tired of this. Oh, come on. Open, you stupid




...What?




Well, huh.




Wait...Danishes! This means I've got to check everything now.

Next time: We level up our snooping skill.

Fun Fact: The stereotypical sexy French maid is basically a version of the soubrette stock character in theater and opera.